How it started
It was March 29th, 2017, and I was on my way to get my 3-year-old son from nursery when my car crashed, it flipped multiple times and ended up at the side of the motorway in a ditch, I was conscious at the time and remember it all up until the paramedics came to give me ketamine, I remember hearing the helicopter landing the fire brigade cutting the roof off of the car, and I remember seeing my family members, especially my son, mum dad, and brothers flash before my eyes I thought I was going to die.
When I got to the hospital I remember seeing my family before I went into surgery, and then after it and I woke up they were all around me. They didn't know the damage that was caused at this point or what the outcome would be I was told I might have to have my leg amputated, and that I will be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I had 3 clean-out operations to clean the wound as it was a 4x4 wooden fence post. They had to go through my thigh, I had broken my femur and severed 3cm out of my sciatic nerve. After all the cleanout operations I finally had the final one on my 24th birthday 5th April 2017 to put my leg back together, after this one I was on bed rest for around 10 weeks and had a heat blanket over my leg for most of the time to help it heal. Over time I started to get it moving to do physio and learning to walk again it was hard work and I remember I used to break down every day. I missed normal life and most of all I missed my baby, mainly because I wasn't in a hospital in the area I live I was about 30 mins away in a trauma hospital. I came out of the hospital around mid-June times. I was so happy to be home.
2nd time round
But then in August of 2017, the metal rod in my leg got from my thigh to my knee, it snapped and I had to go back to the hospital and wait in pain for 2 weeks until there was a bed for me at the trauma hospital. Then they transported me there, once there they found out I had e-coli in my leg from where the wound was dirty and I was really ill, I became septic and had to have a blood transfusion. I remember being so scared and down and depressed I wanted to die as I wasn't in a good mental place at all, I thought I was healing well and then all of this happened to me. But after waiting for weeks I finally got the operation and done the whole healing process again and the physio learning to walk. I was so happy when I finally came out of hospital weeks later.
I have struggled so much with my mental health and accepting who I am now as I was 23 when it happened, and to go from 2 working legs to 1 that from my knee down I have limited feeling and movement cant wiggle my toes or move my ankle. When touched I feel pins and needles it's such a strange feeling. I had mixed emotions about it for so long but it's been 5 years since then and I've learned to love myself again and despite the pain, I go through daily I have to keep trying to push myself as I have my son watching me. I remember I used to look at the scars on my leg and sit and cry because I thought they looked ugly, now I am so grateful I still have a leg and appreciate what it had done for me. It could have been a different story, I wish the pain would stop but you learn to live with it over time and find ways to help make it not so painful. Even though life has been so hard, I think it has changed me for the better it has made me know what I want from life and also not take it for granted as we never know when our days are over.